Jan and John Maggs Antiques

The Dutch Onion Bottle

Shortly after noon on the first day of the VADA show, a good-looking family of four walked into our booth. A young boy stood at the front of the group, clutching a Dutch squat bottle he had taken from one of our shelves, while his parents and younger sister stood behind him. Dad told us that their son, Luke, had a question about the bottle. 

We turned our attention to Luke, who asked politely, “How much does this cost?” 

I reached the bottle from his hands, inverted it, and showed him the price tag affixed to the bottom: $165. 

Silently, the boy and his father exchanged glances that made clear their understanding. The question was not a frivolous one. 

The boy’s father then explained that his son had recently broken one of a pair of similar bottles in their collection. Although he had not been punished, his parents expected him to contribute to the cost of replacement. 

“How did it happen?” I asked. 

“I was trying to kill a fly,” Luke replied.

“Did you get it?”

He nodded in reply.

 Recklessly, I ventured, “Well, one out of two isn’t bad.”

I noticed with relief that both parents were still smiling and volunteered, “In view of the circumstances, I think that the price could be reduced to $140,” then turned away to allow the family to make their decision in private.

Within moments they decided to purchase the bottle. As she wrote the check, Mom explained, with a friendly smile, that her son’s allowance would be “garnished” for a month or two, while the obligation was settled.

Now, more than a month later, the family once again have a pair of 18^th century Dutch onion bottles, and (if Mom’s time-line was achieved), Luke's obligation has been satisfied, and a valuable lesson has been learned. We assume that his allowance has been restored to pre-disaster level -- at least if he hasn’t been chasing any more flies.

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